Children at wedding can make or break the day,if you are at an age where a lot of your friends have little ones, then you may want to give them a break and suggest no children, so they can really let their hair down and enjoy themselves.

Or if you are happy to include kids then be prepared for extra planning, children's menus, entertainment packs, perhaps a babysitter, and about 10.00 pm a lot of very tired grumpy kids!! By then even the parents are ready for bed.

If you are planning to have small children in your wedding party then that's whole other senario .... Don't stress they can be great fun but don't expect the ultimate performance, bank on laughing a lot and take it in your stride.

Flower Girl - who to choose... This is the adorable little moppet that everyone knows, such as a cousin, a niece, a godchild, a stepchild or even your own, usually between the ages of three and eight. Little girls were born to be flower girls, born performers, but watch out they can steal the show!! For very little ones consider getting them a friend - a bridal bear they can carry. It helps when things start to look a little scary

• Flower girls are not to be confused with junior bridesmaids, who are older and wear a tween version of the bridesmaid's dresses, please do not lump them in with the children , they take this task very seriously!

• Prepare to deal with disruptions, crying, tantrums, and just not making it down the aisle. Remember to keep telling them how beautiful they look, and they will perform beautifully - after all, it's all about them!

Ring Bearer - who to choose ... Four to 8 years, any younger and they are just not interested, "That's for girls"... Usually dressed in a suit, but choose one that won't turn the velvet pillow into a projectile!

• Be sure to secure the rings to whatever they are being carried on, or better still use fake rings, the wedding rings are not really something you want to trust to a four year old! The real ones are safe in the best man's pocket. Remember he may not be too keen to hold the flower girls hand, needs lots of encouragement.

*Remember to laugh - children are unpredictable at weddings, many times it just makes the occasion unforgettable.